Safe Passage - Committed to Ending Domestic Violence and Oppression

UMass Recognizes DV Awareness Month with a CandleLight Vigil

2011-10-28T15:04:00.000-04:00

I was honored to speak at the annual DV vigil at UMass on October 25, 2011. Whenever I get a little tired or discouraged or wonder if there's anybody out there who cares about domestic violence, I get invited to an event like this and it reinvigorates me. Here is the text of my remarks.

Thank you for attending this important gathering. Thank you also for planning and promoting the events and discussions that recognize October as domestic violence awareness month.

Rallies, vigils, and gatherings like this are important because they inform us, provide us with tools and ideas, motivate us, and provide inspiration. They confirm our unity and provide us with a sense of community. Yet, if all we did about domestic violence was attend vigils, mourn the dead, and talk with each other, then we are NOT really doing the work necessary to work toward ending domestic violence. Rather, we must use this gathering as a decision making point, as a moment of collective and individual commitment to doing things differently, to preparing ourselves for the role of bystander, peacemaker, change agent, and advocate. We commit to do these things, not only in settings like these where it's relatively easy, but in our daily lives, our day-to-day interactions, in the ways we choose to use our time, our talents, and our resources.

Domestic violence is a learned behavior, it's the logical conclusion to our society's constant barrage of messages that promote an oppressive, power-over, patriarchal, and hostile culture. Oppression plays out on a societal and institutional level through political systems that are more about getting elected and re-elected than leadership, through systems that offer only closed doors and barriers to healthcare, justice, education, and resources, through corporate structures that promote profit over people and the bottom-line over fairness. It gets played out individually through domestic violence, through abuse of power and control in relationships, through sexual violence, through bullying, through racist and cultural slurs and hate crimes against people of color, immigrants, through hate crimes and harassment against gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people. We know that we can educate and hold people accountable while at the same time realize that people who engage in violence are merely reflecting the violence of our society. It starts in subtle and even unseen ways. I heard a speaker recently say "people commit domestic violence for the same reasons that I speed -- I know how to do it without being caught, I see everybody doing it, the consequences if I am caught are relatively minor, and the social consequences if you know that I speed are relatively nonexistent."

Let us make a decision now to be part of the transformation that can and will ultimately end domestic violence. Let us hold a vision - a clear and focused picture, almost as if it were a memory, of a relationship, a school, and city or town, a country, a world that is free of violence. The vision of an absence of violence in relationships is much more exciting than simply a relationship where there's no hitting, verbal abuse, financial abuse, spiritual manipulation. Just like we have a vision for a world without war - we call it peace. Our vision of peace is much deeper and more exciting than simply a world where everyone drops their arms. Peace is a vision that necessarily includes economic fairness, environmental sustainability, justice and accountability, wellness and freedom, relationships based on joy, mutual support, growth, and contributing to the community. Every one of us has a part in realizing this vision. It will take our focused and sustained attention and support at every decision point by each of us. It will require us to be open, to be willing, to be hopeful, to honor our ancestors and prepare for our children, to give ourselves constant permission and to seek inspiration to be the light of change.

I offer the words of this anthem by Holly Near

I am open

We are open to learning, to knowing the difficult, painful, horrifying and unsettling facts about domestic violence. The ones we have trouble picturing, the ones we don't want to admit, the ones that don't match our understanding of humans and our potential to love and grow with each other. These are the facts that require us to walk in the world with caution and put us at risk of closing ourselves and distancing ourselves from others.

I am willing

We must be willing to confront, educate, advocate, to be the friend that our friends need us to be, to be the roommate, parent, child, student, teacher that offers feedback, alternatives, that gets in the way of continued beliefs and attitudes that promote violence, to risk being seen as having no sense of humor, to risk being seen as not going along with the dominant culture, to risk being a bystander, a peacemaker, to taking an active role in naming and addressing the attitudes that promote violence.

For to be hopeless would seem so strange

It is our nature and our birthright to be hopeful, to imagine and believe that things can be different, and to be bold and clear in our belief that violence is unnecessary, not useful, and preventable.

It dishonors those who came before us

We owe it to those who believed in this vision enough to start our organizations like Everywoman's Center, like Safe Passage, like SafePlan, like NELCWIT, The Women of Color Leadership Network, and the Stonewall Center. Starting with basically nothing for resources, the women and men who started these organizations took risks that we no longer have to take, and paved the way for us to continue to move the work forward.

So lift me up to the light of change

We commit to being and shining this light, a vision of a safe and violent-free society, that is built on relationships and families that nurture joy and support.

So I invite you to put this together as the chorus:

I am open

I am willing

For to be hopeless would seem so strange

It dishonors those who came before us

So lift me up to the light of change

As the Executive Director of Safe Passage, Marianne Winters will be the first to tell you that no two days are ever alike when you’re working on addressing domestic violence. She is passionate about the multi-faceted work of social change and humbled whenever she is witness to someone’s healing process. We hope you enjoy keeping in touch with Safe Passage through this blog.

Building Safety and Accountability

2011-09-20T10:33:00.003-04:00

One of the most promising trends in the work to address domestic violence is the work on systems reform. This has traditionally involved improving laws, training for key personnel who come in contact with victims or offenders, and building collaborations across professions. Last week I attended a conference in Northampton on sentencing, probation and batterer's intervention. This was a gathering of 60 people from the courts, probation, victim services, law enforcement, batterer's intervention, and prosecution. I caught up with Mary Kociela, the Director of Domestic Violence Programs for the District Attorney's Office and a long time advocate and expert in domestic violence. I asked her to share her thoughts about this event and its significance.

Q. Mary, today's conference is called Sentencing, Probation and Batterer's Intervention Safety and Accountability Audit Team. That's quite a title. Can you tell me what's happening today?

A. The purpose of the conference was to gather together representatives from law enforcement, the courts and advocacy groups in order to present the findings and recommendations of the safety audit team. This particular audit focused on probation and batterer’s intervention. The keynote speaker, Jim Henderson, was someone with a background in both who shared his experiences and helped us to move forward with a plan to implement the audit findings.

Q. Usually when we hear the word audit, we think about columns of numbers and whether or not they add up, but this is something different. What is a Safety and Accountability Audit?

A. This kind of audit is very different and much more exciting than columns and numbers. The idea is to take a close look at your system response to an issue, in this case domestic violence, and identify ways to strengthen it. An audit team is convened that is representative of the district and the part of the system you are auditing. Once convened, the team reviews existing procedures, and conducts interviews and observations, in order to identify gaps in the system that can be improved. It is a very collaborative process that is always focused on identifying best practices that will strengthen victim safety and offender accountability.

Q. How did you go about it?

A. Findings and recommendations are revealed through interviews, observations and a review of current policies and procedures. The team looked at how prosecutors make recommendations for sentencing and how probation officers recommend probation conditions, as well as, policies for monitoring the defendant’s compliance and the role of the batterer’s intervention program. We examined the ways in which these agencies are linked, how they interact and communicate and the effect of their policies and practices on offender accountability and victim safety. Each audit begins with development of a safety audit question that guides the process and helps to focus the inquiry of the team in developing recommendations. Our guiding audit question was, “How can our criminal justice system increase safety for victims and increase accountability for domestic violence offenders?”

Q. What did you find?

A. There were many recommendations that resulted from this audit that are documented in the audit report.

Q. What does all of this mean for our communities?

A. This audit was the culmination of ten years of hard work which I believe greatly benefits the citizens in the Northwestern District. Prior to this audit, two other safety audits were performed focused on police, dispatch and court practices.

In 2007, based on the numerous recommendations detailed in the first two safety audit reports, our office obtained a grant to implement the recommendations. We spent two years training police, prosecutors and court personnel to implement policies that make victim safety an essential part of the process. All police departments in our jurisdiction received a copy of a domestic violence policy entitled “Law Enforcement Policies and Procedures”, which included a policy on officer involved DV cases. The Executive Office of Public Safety and Security approved the policy and adopted some of the content for their statewide Domestic Violence Guidelines for police. Additional products resulting from the audit included digital cameras for police, police report checklists, dispatcher response to DV calls checklist, police and prosecutor training DVDs and police charging booklets.

Additionally, a strong recommendation of the courts and prosecution safety audit was to identify and monitor high risk offenders. The audit team wanted to increase the courts ability to treat DV offenders proportionally to the danger they presented to victims. We studied existing high risk teams to identify the model that would work best for our area. The result is the creation of our current high risk team which identifies high risk offenders, shares information between agencies and make recommendations for the sentencing and monitoring of offenders that reflect the severity of the offender’s violent behavior.

By working in collaboration to strengthen our policies and responses we create a more seamless, coordinated approach to combating domestic violence in our community.

Stay Tuned ... more about the High Risk Assessment Team coming soon.

In Video Message, Vice President Biden Calls on New Generation to Take Action in Preventing Dating Violence and Sexual Assault at School and On Campus

2011-09-13T13:00:00.000-04:00

On the 17^th Anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, we thought you might be interested in a new video message from Vice President Biden.

All the best,

The Office of the Vice President

The White House

Office of the Vice President

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

September 13, 2011

In Video Message, Vice President Biden Calls on New Generation to Take Action in Preventing Dating Violence and Sexual Assault at School and On Campus

On 17^th Anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, Vice President Biden Says “1 is too Many” Youth Victims of Dating Violence and Sexual Assault

Washington, D.C. – Earlier today, in a video message tweeted by @VP, Vice President Biden called on high school and college students to share their ideas for how to prevent dating violence and sexual assault at their schools and on their college campuses. Over the next two weeks, young men and women are invited to join this important conversation by submitting their ideas via the new whitehouse.gov/1is2many page or by using the hashtag #1is2many on Twitter.

Despite the significant progress made to reduce violence against women since the landmark Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) – authored by then-Senator Biden – was signed into law on September 13, 1994, young women aged 16-24 continue to experience the highest rates of rape and sexual assault. One in five young women will be a victim of sexual assault during college, while one in ten teens have been physically hurt on purpose by a boyfriend or girlfriend in the last year.

“The only way we’re going to stop it is for all of us to speak up and act and make it clear that violence against women will not be tolerated at your school, on your campus, at any time, for any reason period,” Vice President Biden says in the video message. “No means no. No means no if she’s drunk or you’re sober. No mean no if you’re in a dorm room or on the street. No means no even if she said yes first and changed her mind. No means no, no matter what.”

“I am asking all of you to help get this message out, all across the country, on every single campus in the country,” the Vice President continues. “I want to know from you…what has your school done to make you feel safer? What could they do that they’re not doing, to make you feel safer? What ideas do you have to help prevent dating violence and sexual assault and make campuses safer for everyone?”

For over 20 years, Vice President Biden has led the fight to combat violence against women. With the introduction of VAWA, then-Senator Biden exposed high rates of domestic violence, sexual assault and stalking experienced by women every day in this country. Over the past year, in response to the high rates of violence and abuse young women are still experiencing, the Vice President has refocused his longstanding commitment to reducing violence against women specifically on teens and young women aged 16-24.

In April, the Vice President announced comprehensive guidance with Secretary of Education Arne Duncan to help schools, colleges and universities better understand their obligations under federal civil rights laws to prevent and respond to the problem of campus sexual assault.

In July, the Vice President, with the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy and Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius, launched the “Apps Against Abuse” challenge – a national competition to develop an innovative software application, or “app,” that provides young adults with tools to help prevent sexual assault and dating violence in real time. The winner of the challenge will be announced next month.

In Video Message, Vice President Biden Calls on New Generation to Take Action in Preventing Dating Violence and Sexual Assault at School and On Campus

2011-09-13T12:56:00.000-04:00

I'm happy to pass this on as an example of some of the good things that are happening in Washington.

On the 17^th Anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, we thought you might be interested in a new video message from Vice President Biden.

All the best,

The Office of the Vice President

The White House

Office of the Vice President

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

September 13, 2011

In Video Message, Vice President Biden Calls on New Generation to Take Action in Preventing Dating Violence and Sexual Assault at School and On Campus

On 17^th Anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, Vice President Biden Says "1 is too Many" Youth Victims of Dating Violence and Sexual Assault

"The only way we're going to stop it is for all of us to speak up and act and make it clear that violence against women will not be tolerated at your school, on your campus, at any time, for any reason period," Vice President Biden says in the video message. "No means no. No means no if she's drunk or you're sober. No mean no if you're in a dorm room or on the street. No means no even if she said yes first and changed her mind. No means no, no matter what."

"I am asking all of you to help get this message out, all across the country, on every single campus in the country," the Vice President continues. "I want to know from you…what has your school done to make you feel safer? What could they do that they're not doing, to make you feel safer? What ideas do you have to help prevent dating violence and sexual assault and make campuses safer for everyone?"

In July, the Vice President, with the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy and Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius, launched the "Apps Against Abuse" challenge – a national competition to develop an innovative software application, or "app," that provides young adults with tools to help prevent sexual assault and dating violence in real time. The winner of the challenge will be announced next month.

###

The White House · 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW · Washington DC 20500 · 202-456-1111

Safe Passage
committed to ending domestic violence and oppression in women's lives

Marianne Winters, Executive Director
(413) 586-1125 X20
marianne@safepass.org
43 Center Street, Suite 304
Northampton, MA 01060

www.safepass.org
Subscribe to our blog at http://safepassageblog.blogspot.com/

Girls with Generous and Open Hearts

2011-07-12T10:22:00.001-04:00

My first community event at my new job was a visit to Girl Scout Troop 11126 at their year-end celebration at Look Park. I heard that their community service project was to benefit the kids at the Safe Passage shelter so I was pleased to come out and meet them. They had decided that they wanted to help some other kids who might be sad, so they learned about our shelter and the kids who are living there temporarily while their moms work to rebuild their lives after escaping violence. They knew, without having to look at big research studies that say so, that the kids who live at Safe Passage are the friends they don't know yet, not strangers, but kids who have the same cares and concerns as they do. These girls knew that while their summer was just beginning and they could look forward to trips to the beach, going to camp, and hanging out with their friends, that summer would be very different for the Safe Passage kids. So, the girls decided to make craft projects that the kids in shelter could make. The result of the project would be that everybody could have a wall pocket, decorated with colorful and shiny sequins, paint and of course, googly eyes. I went to their picnic shelter and thanked them for their caring and their generosity. They asked me incredible questions about the shelter and what life is like for the kids there. Are there toys to play with and movies to watch? Are there books to read and can they play outside? Will they have a new place to live soon? Will they go to school?

I accepted the kits, and after the friendship circle and hugs and goodbyes, reflected on this group of 8 and 9 year olds and their openness and kindness. I imagined that we might see some of them in our volunteer training in 10 years or so, maybe be able to refer our clients to them when they have their law practices or medical offices. Maybe they'll remember imagining what it might be like for kids who witness domestic violence and teach their own kids to value peace in their families and never take their safety for granted.

Thanks to Girl Scout Troop 11126, we are a little closer to the vision of a violence free world because of their caring and concern for the kids of Safe Passage.

As the Executive Director of Safe Passage, Marianne Winters will be the first to tell you that no two days are ever alike when you're working on addressing domestic violence. She is passionate about the multi-faceted work of social change and humbled whenever she is witness to someone's healing process. We hope you enjoy keeping in touch with Safe Passage through this blog.

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

2011-07-04T20:53:00.002-04:00

It's the 4^th of July and I'm watching John Adams, the HBO miniseries that chronicles the remarkable period of time before, during, and after the Revolutionary War through the eyes of John Adams, Abigail Adams and their children. One of my favorite lines is offered by Abigail who, after reading a draft of John's closing arguments for a trial, says to him, "I fear you have overburdened your argument with ostentatious erudition". I love the elegance in the language and the fact that in this short sentence she offers important feedback and reflection to her husband and that he willingly listens to her. In modern day conversation, the words probably wouldn't be as well chosen and perfectly stated. I also enjoyed John's reaction. He wasn't necessarily happy to hear that his wife thought he was somewhat arrogant, but he listened to her as a peer, as a respected confidante, as an equal. He also applied her advice and won the case.

This mini series portrays a marriage based in love and commitment as well as mutual respect. I think about the women that we serve at Safe Passage who are escaping violence in their relationships and wonder what would have happened had one of them uttered a similar sentiment to their husbands or boyfriends. Would it have triggered a beating or an abusive comment or put down? When someone in a relationship uses violence, control, domination, and abuse, the essential elements of any relationship including mutual respect and equality are absent. It's the reason that we offer education on healthy relationships as a means to prevent domestic violence. Someone in fear of being beaten is not going to give honest advice to her partner as an equal, out of fear of the consequences. People can be flawed, even arrogant and stubborn, without being abusive. I like that John Adams showed an example of a flawed and brilliant man whose relationship helped him be a better man because he accepted his partner's counsel and advice and love.

Most people think about Independence Day as a national holiday and if they reflect on anything, it will be the historical significance. I think it would be appropriate to also reflect on why it is that, due to domestic violence, so many people are unable to fully pursue life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness due to fear and oppression. For victims of domestic violence, these rights are often unattainable. At Safe Passage, we work to assure these rights. We promote life by working in collaboration with law enforcement on cases that are high risk for continued violence and homicide. We work on liberty by providing safe shelter, supportive counseling, and education so that women escaping violence can rebuild their lives. We promote the pursuit of happiness by celebrating the strengths and achievements of our clients as they seek a safe and just happiness for themselves and their children.

Happy Independence Day and thanks for your part in promoting life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for victims of domestic violence through your support of Safe Passage.

Marianne Winters is the Executive Director of Safe Passage and is passionate about the multi-faceted work of building a safe and just community.

I Hope You're Proud of Yourself

2011-06-29T10:53:00.002-04:00

When parents say this to their kids, they don't always mean it the way it sounds. For me, as the newly hired Executive Director of Safe Passage, it's the first thing that occurs to me when I think of this community and its support and commitment to Safe Passage. I started this job a few weeks ago, and in the midst of the usual orientation, learning how to work the phone system, and getting to know the people, I have been constantly reminded of the strong and bright spirit of support of Safe Passage by this community. Established in 1977 with the name Necessities/Necesidades, Safe Passage is clearly one of the sources of pride in Hampshire County. This community has been there for this organization, and in turn for the women and children who we serve. You've been there as volunteers, staff members, board members, donors, event participants, strategizers, and general supporters. This community's generosity and commitment to ending domestic violence shines through in your municipal policies, your workplaces, your business community, and your families, neighborhoods. You've laced up your running shoes, cooked amazing food, shared your musical and artistic talents, as well as your business skills. Safe Passage is poised to continue its journey in support of the people who are on their own journeys toward safety, justice, and wholeness. I'm proud and pleased to be here and look forward to our continued work together. I hope you're proud of yourself as well.